Okay, so I’m literally bursting out of my clothes. I remember a while back my pants wouldn’t button and I freaked out. But, I have to be honest, I kept stress eating whatever I wanted and I moved on to the next size in my closet, and now I’m bursting out of them. My muffin top stomach and the double boob effect is definitely not a good look, and neither is the joint pain. But, I told myself, I will NOT buy a size 22 pants again ever. I gave away all of my fat girl clothes to the Haiti victims. I think subconsciously if I buy some new pants in that size I will be telling myself that it’s okay to gain weight. I got on the scale this morning and I realized that I had gradually almost gained all of the weight back. (Note to self: avoiding the scale does not mean you didn’t gain weight…)
I guess this is what hitting rock bottom is like? What a wake-up call. I’ve tried every fad diet including the lemonade diet despite my knowledge that they don’t work. Well, actually, they do work great for a week or two and then you gain it back plus more. I guess I needed a reminder. I’m such a big picture person, I want a best-selling novel, I want 4,000 hits a day on my blog, I want to be a real estate tycoon, I want to lose 100 pounds, I want to retire at 40, I want world peace (LOL)….
But, I have to take it one day at time, despite the fact that that goes against my core personality. So, TODAY, I’m avoiding office treats in the kitchen and TODAY I’m tracking my food. Even Roni, my blogging/weight loss role model has to track sometimes, and she’s maintained her 70 pound loss for years. I hate tracking my food, but it works. I hate feeling like I need weekly support meetings but I do. I hate that have to eat veggies and fruit with every meal but I do. But…I really love that I was brave enough to write this post and hopefully inspire someone in a similar situation to take it one day at a time. “I only feel failure when I stop trying.”
What Did Carli Eat Today?
B– Slim Fast with almond milk
L– Santa Fe Grilled Salad with a handful of tortilla chips
D– Healthy Choice Frozen Entree and a side of Brocolli and cheese
S– Bowl of Cereal
Activity – Christmas Shopping for 3 hours lol